Day 80 - Lomka
Mobile Trash, Fifty, WTF ·
Sam’s Take:
This is the kind of game we would usually skip if we hadn’t pre-picked them due to Skeeter being on vacation. You click the button, clay man slaps their head on it, counter goes up.
Out of the three “count the clicks” games we’ve played so far, this is the best one. Eat it 50 and Giraffe.
Recommend: No
Replay Percentage Chance: No
Time Played: Yes
Skeeter’s Take:
What’s up New Jersey! I’m currently hanging from a hammock in the middle of the Oregon Desert playing a game about a man slapping his face against a button and watching my score go up. Here’s a photo I took from my POV from where I’m sleeping tonight:
I have had damn near zero digital stimulus since I’ve got out here, and more sun than I could possibly ever need, and I’m having a bit of a moment as I swing in the slight breeze in my hammock looking out on the full moon in the distance:
Damn, I’m so lucky we live in a time where I am able to go online, find something some other person has created, and talk about it. I think back to before the digital age and contemplate on people buying whole vinyl albums just for a single song they like, and I just feel so goddamn happy that I can go to Spotify and add that song to 6 different playlists in a matter of 30 seconds. The fact that Sam and I are able to even do this stupid daily project has me grinning. This project wouldn’t be possible 20 years ago. There wouldn’t be enough material for us to write 365 reviews (or rather, we’d really have to dig for it) and it’s so surreal to me that I’m able to post a review from my phone of someone else’s game while I’m sitting in the middle of nowhere. That’s fucking cool! I think I take for granted the accessibility we have these days and this is a good reminder of how lucky I am. How lucky Sam and I are that we are able to do this at all.
Perhaps it’s the fresh air moving more oxygen to my brain than I’ve seen in the past 10 years. Maybe it’s that blazing dazzle of Vitamin-D-Ultra-rays emanating from the burning ball in the sky onto my skin that is making me feel sentimental? I’m not sure, but it’s making me think a lot more about Lomka than I normally would.
Lomka is barely scratching the surface of being a “game”. The player clicks, and the little odd clay buddy slaps his head on a button that makes the player’s counter go up by one. That’s it.
Let’s look at this a little closer though - just look at the artstyle for this game:
This Gumby looking Doof-Ass man is so damn goofy and I love him. We must do what we can to see Dollar General Gumby through to his ultimate goals in life. But notice that Mr. Gumwad doesn’t have any arms ml This is solely for the purpose of making this little dude hit the button with his head, which is objectively more funny than him clicking it with his hands (you can view my doctoral thesis on objective funny on JSTOR). That’s awesome. Props on you Lomka.
I also have to ask: are these graphics practical? I don’t know enough about 3D modeling or clay modeling, but I would wager due to the shadows cast from the button pedestal and how round those look that this was probably CGI, rather than practical. But how badass would it be if this guy was a real clay model? Pretty cool! Still I appreciate the attempt at an art direction - it’s more than could be said for something like Giraffe and 50 (thanks for reminding me which click-counter games we’ve played, Sam). Lomka has animation (2 whole frames, wow!), an interesting (assumedly) original character and a working exit button. There was some real heart put into this, I just wish it wasn’t a boring “count how many clicks you clicked you freaky clicker” game.
To circle back around to my ramble at the beginning of this review - I’m glad Lomka exists. I’m glad someone is working towards developing something they are passionate about, or are interested in learning about. I’m glad I exist in a time where I am able to write about Lomka online, where it will inevitably be lost to time since the internet doesn’t really exist. In 500 years when the Orangutan scientists are digging through the old ancient remains of a 10’x10’ New York apartment and they haul up an old internet router, they are going to look at a plastic box full of strange holes. They’ll analyze it in their Orangutan laboratories and put it through all kinds of testing. Some ape will come to the conclusion that the box was meant to be used as an agricultural starter box to plant fragile seeds in, and they’ll never see the invisible data lost to time. They’ll never know what truly existed in the imaginations of billions of humans all over the planet. They won’t see the communications, the memes, the shitposts, the fights, the fake Am I An Asshole reddit threads. They won’t see the videos, the video games, or the blogs people wrote. Everything will be lost in the clouds; in the vacuum of time. They will look upon a box of plastic and wonder and debate upon its function, never getting to see or access the online portal it leads to.
I think about the masterpieces the human civilization has created, and how many of those don’t exist in a real, physical space. The Shakespeares of our time will never be found or acknowledged.
Lomka was never going to stand the test of time. Lomka will probably be lost within these 365 days of reviews.
Don’t worry Lomka, you may be unremarkable and forgettable, but everything will become unremarkable and forgettable with time.
Hey look, it’s dark now!
Recommend: No
Replay Percentage Chance: 0%
Time Played: 3 Minutes
Did It Work On My Phone: YES
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