Day 89 - -DON'T CLICK THE CRAB-

Multiplayer, Has Treant Protector In It, Bangers · 28 Jul 2024

Skeeter’s Take:

Good evening, welcome to Hell:

You might be wondering why I just showed you a screenshot of the Dota 2 mainpage. If you’ve played Dota before, you’ll know it’s akin to experiencing Hell for a few hours.

I’m not going to talk too much about Dota right now, (perhaps Sam and I will review it at a later date) but it’s important to know this context for today’s game. Dota is a Multiplayer Online Battle Arena (MOBA) that has taken over too much of my life. My brothers play it. Most of my friends play it. Do we enjoy it? I don’t know.

A while back, Valve introduced something called the “Arcade” which allowed players and community members to create their own custom games using the Dota engine and assets.

Here’s what the Arcade looks like today:

As you can see, there are plenty of players for the more popular games. You might also notice the very clear rip-off game “DOTA SURVIVORS”. I don’t know what to say about that other than I think it’s incredibly funny that they didn’t even try to hide it, and uploaded the Vampire Survivors art for their game.

Anyway, back in 2015 when Sam and I were young, we found this game called -DON’T CLICK THE CRAB-

It has become a relic lost in time. It somehow still functions, despite it not being updated since 2015, and Dota letting you know it’s pre-7.00 patch.

I don’t have to do any heavy lifting explaining -DON’T CLICK THE CRAB-, the About section says it all. “There’s a crab. Don’t click it.”

And it’s really that simple.

Sam and I each have our respective Mr. Skeletal to control. We have one job: -DON’T CLICK THE CRAB- We resist temptation fairly easily for a while, as the crab plays a great song about a “GIANT ENEMY CRAB” and it’s pretty catchy.

It doesn’t loop.

Eventually the boredom sets in. Who will cave and click the crab? The simple Dota custom game turned into a game of attrition.

Eventually, I can’t stand the silence. I can’t stand running around looking at the ambient rats and cockroaches scattered across the map. Eventually, I can’t pretend like I’m still having fun.

I click the crab.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

A man screams out.

Sam laughs.

My character All Chats “I CLICKED THE GODDAMN CRAB”

I cry.

In all seriousness, I have a lot of fond memories of Sam secretly launching our Dota party directly into -DON’T CLICK THE CRAB-, our friends would reluctantly groan, accept the game, and spend the few minutes waiting for everyone to load in only to have someone’s auto-attack setting immediately have them click the crab upon loading in.

It’s great. I love -DON’T CLICK THE CRAB-

Recommend: Yes

Replay Percentage Chance: Actually 100%

Time Played: Lost count