Day 301 - Fuck You Witch
Horror, WTF, Toilet Humor ·
Sam’s Take:
Before I get into this one I want to point out that I don’t have a weak processor. I say this because I know all of you will think that I’m considering this game a bummer because of my processor but I assure you that is not the case. I have a very excellent processor.
Fuck You Witch is obviously a joke. You know it’s a joke because the first item you pick up makes the same gender joke we had eradicated a decade ago on the first item description you see, complete with a button to make a “bu-dum-tiss” sound in case you thought that shit went hard.
You enter a nightmare world and have to do some fetch quests. Along the way a witch will come out and try to kill you. The only way to drive it away is by yelling the correct Russian curse words into your microphone before it reaches you.
It’s a funny idea, but I don’t know Russian so I often had to re-do sections because I was mispronouncing something. The idea of yelling “fuck off” at a monster is fun, but I don’t have the skill to do it in Russian, and the jokes around it are at a 10% hit rate. Did I ever laugh, sure, but a kill screen that reads “you were fucked like a bitch” is just a little too edgelord middle-school Sam for my tastes.
Recommend: No
Replay Percentage Chance: 2%
Time Played: 18 Minutes
Skeeter’s Take:
I was so excited to play Fuck You Witch. I sat down to make another video and got through the intro of a house before I had to go and play/host Jackbox for a friend’s birthday. Then 9pm rolls around and I’m tired and have to work tomorrow.
The funny thing about doing this every single day is that sometimes life just gets in the way. Sometimes I don’t have time to sit down and give Fuck You Witch it’s proper dues. Sometimes I have to just wander through the first level of the house, take a screenshot of the funny picture on the wall and call it a day.
The intro seemed very promising from a goofy standpoint. It’s not well translated, the game starts with the main character immediately trauma dumping before he’s even awake, and there’s a point that you hear your neighbors banging next door.
After reading Sam’s review, I’m disappointed it’s only in Russian. I find the core idea of screaming obscenities at a ghost to get it to go away funny and intriguing.
Maybe we’ll come back to this, but the days are running out and I feel bad making those empty promises.
Recommend: I am not really sure
Replay Percentage Chance: 20%
Time Played: 15 minutes
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